The time in between....and now
A ride I've done off and on for several years is the local MS150. It has dwindled in participants over the years for various reasons. Used to be, I'd know a bunch of the people up there, but not any more. Arriving at the designated start time and then having to wait for registration, I started nearly 30 minutes behind most riders. Still, I just hopped on and took off looking for a wheel to hang onto. I rode nearly all day on my own, got one helluva sunburn, but had a pretty good time. It was all so unfamiliar, but at the same time.....I was really where I needed to be on that particular day. The number of people I came across that were riding with some form of MS made me take an inventory of what I have to deal with; nothing compared to that.
About this same time, I saw an obituary of a fellow class mate - a Lass if you will, that I've known since second grade. Truly one of the sweetest people you'd ever meet in your life. I had heard last fall that she was in the fight of her life, dealing with the Big-C. Turns out, she was taken far too soon. Second grade was my first year in a new school, that I was re-assigned to due to boundary changes. Aside from a kid that had moved into my neighborhood, I really didn't know anyone. The teacher was a wretch! I hated that school. Throw in a few things I probably had been dealing with elsewhere and it qualifies as a very bad experience. I recently found that class picture and noticed how many of those kids became good friends over the years. I also noticed another class mate that died a few years ago as as result of the Big-C.
The Wilderness
I suppose it is well known the concept of "wandering in the wilderness", but perhaps we all have our experiences that we can include in that category. In my case, well.....I'm just lost. I recently read the obituary of a guy I used to deliver newspapers to forty-seven years ago. This guy was a stud. A former college basketball player - larger than life. His name was unique and seemed to fit him well - as to why I remembered him so well - at least that image from 1975. Reading his obit, it described how he had advanced Alzheimer's and was confined to some type of assisted living center. I mean, this guy was a mountain of a man - and to have it end like this? A couple weeks ago, a kid that was a year younger than me also died of advanced Alzheimer's. All the while, I've been trying to find it in me to resume some sort of training routine - after all, it's all abut me, right? Well it's not about me, or anything about me. It's about making the most of our time, being a positive influence and trying to live without regrets. But still, where am I and how do I find my way to wherever it is I'm going? Ugh.....the wilderness.
A few years ago I was having to travel a lot for my employer. A friend gave me a copy of Chris Carmichaels book on time limited training. It was based on quasi interval training, with specifics about recovery periods and that sort of thing. My methodology has always focused about stacking miles and suffering through long periods of endurance. Not that I have seen considerable returns on the investment, but I have managed to get through. This year.....well it's been a struggle. I've started to do nightly intervals, focusing on heartrate and total calories of work. It may be flawed, but it is what I have to work with. It is boring as hell, as I ride the same hills over and over again. Pushing myself harder each time, trying to achieve 1000 calories of work in 60 minutes. There is no fanfare, no cheering crowds, no finish line - just a lot of hard work. Sure there are minor setbacks, but the effort is easy to quantify and track. Every night I do this, I have solid measurables. Sure I'm in the wilderness, but I have a compass. Not that I really know where I'm going, but I'll die if I stay here.
Ride HARD!
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